My Top 5 Post-Grad Fears and the Advice that's Keeping Me Sane
In my last semester and a little scared; here are my post-grad fears and advice.
Fear: Having difficulty making friends
By graduating a semester early, I am leaving behind almost all of my friends. So the challenge looming over me, and likely you, is making friends without the help of clubs, classes, or school events... probably for the first time. And to add insult to injury, I have social anxiety which can make meeting new people stressful.
Advice: You've done it before, you can do it again
Four years ago I moved away from my hometown for school, and the friends I've made have taught me a lot about myself, having fun, and life in general. That serves as a testament that I can do it again. And I know there will be other people in the same situation as me who are also looking for friends.
Fear: Growing apart from my family
This has been on my mind a lot recently. No one ever warned me when I was a kid about the natural drifting apart that comes at this stage of life. Don't get me wrong, I will always remain close to my family. But it is scary to think that we all want different things, including wanting to live in different places in the world (yes, the world). My twin sister and I have been together almost every day since the womb... I don't want to imagine a life where I don't get to see her often. I'm typically not an envious person, but this makes me jealous of people whose whole family lives in the same town or state.
Advice: Be intentional about seeing the people you care about
No matter what happens, I will always make time for my family because I know they've got me for life. It may be a little harder to manage to see everyone around the holidays but I'd gladly take on that challenge for the people I care about. Just like most other joys as you get older it's just a matter of carving out the time for them.
Fear: Lacking fulfillment
I feel really lucky that I'm in love with my field, but within itself, marketing is still very broad. I'm excited to try out tons of different niches within marketing in the first few years of my career but I'm also nervous about how long it might take to find a job that I love. I want to be really in love with my job and feel a sense of congruency with the organization that I work for. I know I'll get there one day, but I hope it's sooner rather than later!
Advice: Chase what excites you
The only way to find fulfillment is to have the courage to follow what excites me. Along the way, I'll be building up my skills and acquiring a breadth of knowledge.
Fear: Failing at my life goals
Once I'm an official adult, I can't push my goals to "one day" or they'll never happen. In fact, I feel immense pressure to complete my big goals before I turn 30 (a timeless, unrealistic standard, I know). One of my biggest life goals is to buy a house and share it with a partner, because when you own a house, you can customize it and make it entirely yours from the tiles to the paint colors, and even the layout of the space. That's something I want so desperately -- to own the property on which I live, to make it completely modern and my own, and to feel free to exist in that safe space. That's something you can't do when renting or crashing at your parents' place. It's something that I know will achieve at some point, but it would be great to achieve it sooner rather than later.
Advice: Be patient
I can hear Billy Joel now, "slow down, you're doing fine, you can't be everything you want to be before your time". These are things that I want with such passion that I know I'll get there eventually, I just have to be patient and trust the process.
Fear: Having less time for fun
I am a big kid when it comes to having fun and seeing the mischief in everyday life. I build sand castles when on the beach, I watch and re-watch my Disney faves, and I get super excited to bake and wrap presents around Christmas. I feel there's a weird expectation to shed my childlike joys as I get older and I fear the possibility of the world making me harder or more cynical. Whether that would be good for me or bad, I don't actually know. Right now I like who I am, and that's someone who values enjoyment and positivity.
Advice: Embrace change but hold onto what you don't want to lose
I'm going to try and infuse fun and personality into everything I do because not doing so would be like living life in black and white. At the same time, if over time I become a little less trusting and a little more skeptical of things, there's a chance that change is just, so I'll embrace whatever happens.
I hope you can relate to some of my fears and I hope the advice soothes you as it does me! Besides these few post-grad anxieties, I'm so excited to graduate and start my career and adult life. You can follow me on insta to see my daily shenanigans and chat via dm @ariels_view!
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